posted by Kreiger at 7:40 PM
Gaaaaaaaaaaaaames, games, games, games.
Despite having my 360 for several months now, I've only purchased one boxed game, and even then I bought it for access to a free demo. I'm sure there'll be more games worth buying soon, but for now it all demos and downloads, all the time.
For starters, there was the Halo 3 Beta, also known as The Only Reason I Bought Crackdown. Crackdown was decent in it's own right, but more as a sandbox than a game. The missions were hackneyed and repetitive, especially once you had any form of explosive weaponry. When I lost my profile to a poorly tested update, I discovered that I couldn't be arsed to build my character back up for co-op play.
Halo 3 on the other hand, felt like the same twitch-crack that I've been sucking at for years now. As much as I love the game, I was disappointed to see that the weak grenades and punches from Halo 2 have returned. I like the idea of the new items though, especially the Power Drainer. I couldn't see the point of them when I read the previews, but in the game they completely change the dynamics of the 'bullet-hose' shoot-outs that are my favourite part of the sequels now that I can't clobber people as effectively.
I put precisely an hour into determining that Shadowrun is going to be exactly as bad as it could be. Fair enough, if you need to bastardise rich and interesting source materials you might as well go whole hog, but at least make decent game out of it. Making a poor shooter that forces you to depend on the sort of pond scum you encounter on Live for respawning? Not a good look FASA, not a good look. Jesus, I wrote that forgetting that there's no single-player campaign. Fuck you again FASA. In your ear this time. The best thing that could happen to this game would be for it to be outsold by a Virtual Console re-release of the SNES RPG.
I put about the same amount of time into determining that Overlord is going to eat my balls. Minions? Check. Evil? Check. Teh Funny? Checkz0r. Shame about the re-cycled graphics and voice acting, but at least the guys who did Fable are still getting work. I've read that it'll feature extensive back-tracking too (how much are they paying Molyneux for this? Nothing? Call the lawyers Pete.) but I think the minions will be enough to keep me entertained.
Joust is just as frustrating as you remember it being in the Eighties. Pay your five bucks and download the damn thing. How much did you put into that machine when you were nine? My Dad used to check the arcade first when he lost me in one of the hotels we stayed in on my childhood ski trips because of this game. Option B was in the bar coaching his friend Ted on the video poker.
Given that I mentioned the Virtual Console while shitting on FASA, I should point out that it's been about a month since I turned my Wii on. Such a great idea for console, such a worthless shit-heap of games. Mini-game collections are not games for fuck's sake. It's great to 'expand the audience', but where are the games that use the wii-mote as something other than a gimmick? Perhaps Victorious Boxers will redeem things, but I'm close to selling the little thing off.
posted by Kreiger at 10:36 AM